I have sLaCkEd AgAiN!

Everytime I log onto my blogspot account, I THINK about doing a post!  The thought goes through my mind that I need to document our lives...because I am going to miss this!  Miss this stage of life that we are in right now!

Summer came and went....school started!  Both boys are back into the routine of school!  Garrett started Fourth grade and Ethan is in First!  Garrett's teacher this year is brand new to his school!  She is the young, vibrant blood that St. Patrick School needed!  To say that I am blessed to have my children in that school is a complete understatement.... I THANK GOD on a daily basis that I am able to send my children where they can get Faith and Knowledge all in one building!

The past few weeks, rather month has been difficult in our house!  As you most recall, over the summer I had a weak mommy moment.  They boys have begged for a cat like Wally since we moved into our new house....I put it off and put it off!  So, one day over the summer (one very weak day) I took the boys to the animal shelter with the lesson of saving a cat!  You see, himalayan cats (like Wally) are so expensive and I could just not justify spending the money so foolishly.  We went to the shelter and there was an adorable litter of kittens!  Garrett insisted that we bring these 2 male cats home, that they could not be separated because they are brothers!  And how devastating it would be if him and Ethan ever got separated...blah, blah, blah!  So (in one of my weakest moments) I agreed!  AAaahhhh ~ biggest mistake of my life.  To make a long story short, I fully believe that you cannot have 2 males animals of any sort in one house!  Those cats pee'd everywhere!  I had just put in all new carpeting throughout my entire house and these cats were peeing on it everywhere!  I will spare you all of the details, but the cats had to GO!  A friend that I work with so kindly offered to take them to her farm to hunt mice....oh what a happy life they will have!  But telling a nine year old that his 2 cats are not coming home was heartbreaking!  Absolutely heart-wrenching!  He cried, he sobbed
himself to sleep until I couldn't live with myself anymore!  I left work early one day, went and got them out of school after lunch and we drove an hour and a half to pick up Olivia....a Himalayan kitty that had just turned 8 weeks old, that has the biggest blue eyes and the puffiest fur!  She completes us!  She is what we needed to get our house back to a home....... She is what we could have had 6 of with all the money on spent on the 2 shelter cats trying to figure out what in the heck was wrong with them peeing on everything :) (Never again will I try to be cheap)....

Garrett celebrated his tenth birthday last week!  HE IS 10!  I cannot even get a grip on that!  We celebrated by having a few friends come to the house for pizza and cake.  Then we loaded up and went bowling!  It was fun!  He goes to school with a great group of kids and for that I am thankful!  All he wanted was Skylanders, Skylanders and more Skylanders!

On Tuesday of this week, we had the first major emergency at our house.  The boys got off the bus as they normally do and I could tell that Ethan had been crying...he had his coat up around his head and was just not looking like himself at all!  When he pulled his coat down, that little boy was covered in blood from head to toe!  He had bumped his head on the bus (SoMeHoW) and had a huge gash on the back of it!  After nervously trying to figure out just exactly where the blood was coming from, I decided that it most certainly had to be looked at!  After hours at the emergency room, 4 people holding him down (thank you to my wonderful friend Erin for doing something his momma couldn't do) and 5 StApLeS later .... we were back home having cupcakes for Papa's birthday!  UUuuuggghhh....it is a day that I would like to forever forget, but it was also a day of awakening for me..... a day of reality, that really hit home hard!  Things definitely don't always go as planned, but I really thought that in the case of an emergency as such, that my children had a better support system with the 2 people that are their parents.  I am learning little by little, that the truth hurts.....sometimes it hurts real bad.

Ethan is doing better...he went back to school today and his teacher promised me that she would not let anything happen to him!  I am so thankful that she is so understanding of what those boys mean to me!  I am so blessed in so many ways that I often take for granted!  Even though life didn't follow the path that I thought it would.....my eyes need to see the beauty that lies before me!

Love,
Shawn

But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel.

1 Timothy 5:8

Garrett's First Holy Communion!

Tonight I am motivated!  I am motivated to log onto this blog and write a post because a milestone took place tonight that I do not want to forget!  A milestone that I am ever so proud of.....

I have been missing....missing in action!  The boys and I are continuing to make wonderful memories together, but doing this on my own leaves little time to spare!  BUT, I am going to try!  Try to get our lives documented in the way that I did before ~ and I am starting tonight! HA!

It was Garrett's First Holy Communion tonight and to say that I am proud of him is a complete understatement!  I am SO VERY PROUD OF HIM!  I am proud that he was just as excited about it as I was! 

Dearest Garrett,

The days and years leading up to this evening have been busy, not always easy, but so very beautiful. Thank you for the gift of you! You bring meaning to my life. You have been such a blessing to me as a mother!  It is truly a double gift that we are celebrating this weekend: Jesus is coming to you and you, my sweetness, are going to Him.

I like to think that He is just as excited as you and I are!

I know that you were so excited and nervous for tonight!  Even now, years and years after I made my First Communion, there are moments when I do not feel worthy to receive Our Lord. I guess that’s why we recite the prayer of the centurion at every Mass: Lord, I am not worthy to receive You, but only say the word and I shall be healed.

I am thinking today about what it means to be God’s child. It means that one day you will leave me—this makes me nervous and excited—and you will go off to make your mark on the world. I will not be there every day for you the way I am now, but do you know what? Jesus always will be. You will always have Him close to you—in the Eucharist at daily Mass, and in the tabernacle of the nearest church. What a gift we have in this humble king! What a friend to the end.

It is my hope Garrett, that you continue to love the Lord as we do as a family now.  It is my hope that the sacrifices that I make today to let you worship while you go to school, lead you to be the man of God that you are called to be. 

I love you very much, Garrett. May God bless you today and always, and may our Blessed Mother hold you close.


Yours in Jesus,

Mommy


I hope that you enjoy the pictures from this evening!  What a blessed evening it was .......

Give thanks to the LORD, to Him who alone does great wonders, His love endures forever.

Psalm 136:1,4

Let's Try this Again!!!

So I downloaded the app so I could do this on phone, posted a ton of photos all to have it go to the wrong blog! That is ok! So let's try this again! Here are some, ok a lot of pics from the start of the new year! The weather has been crazy and we have actually been able to ride bikes and play outside on more than one occasion! It has been great!

This picture totally cracks me up!  One Sunday afternoon Garrett had the flu...him and I had been up all night!  Thankfully, my parents came to get Ethan for the day!!  He sat at the front door and waited for them!  He couldn't wait to get out of the house!  Poor boy......

We have been trying to go to the YMCA on a regular basis during their family swim time!  The boys love to swim and it gets some of their energy out.  Missy and the girls went with us on this particular night......tons of fun!!!

All dressed and ready to go......

Our weather this winter has been FANTABULOUS!  Ethan LOVES OUTSIDE ~ warm or cold, he LOVES to be outside!  He broke out his new ATV on one of these warm, spring-like days!

Wally-Cat!  Need I say more.......

Precious Garrett....sound asleep!

Garrett taking his bike for a spin on a warm day!!!

Bathtime continues to be a favorite for both boys.....when I can CON them into getting into the tub!

Garrett's Valentine box this year....A Ninjago Castle!

Bedtime story!

Of course we cannot stay out of the puddles!  We have to get wet, even though it is freezing cold!

Ethan being a big helper to his momma!  Shoveling the back porch!

Wally-Cat AGAIN....the poor thing doesn't have a water dish!  LOL

Another nice day, playing outside as much as we can!

Then in a blink of an eye, we get snow! 

Love this smile!

My precious cupid-boy!!!

Unexpected Blessings.....

I've been thinking a lot about the friends in my life. It is definitely difficult as you grow older and many of your close friends grow apart. Life happens, I get it. It's easy to get consumed with your own circumstances. But, I've never needed my girlfriends more than I have this year. A few have been amazing, but there's also been a few who I have unfortunately grown apart from. I think I definitely have a circumstance in which many times people don't know how to be there or what to say. So instead, they don't say anything.  I've also made some new friends that have become very unexpected blessings in my life!  And to you, I am thankful! 

Our year is off to a great start.....I celebrated my 35th birthday last weekend, which was the most fun I have had in.....oh, well let's say about 7 years!  LOL  I looked at my post from last year on my birthday and what a miserable time in my life it was!  How life changes in such a short time.

With that being said ....December 5!  Are you kidding me!  That was my last post!  Stay tuned....because very soon I am going to post some pictures of these 2 adorable little boys that are my life!  I love the emails that I get from some of you saying that you need a picture fix of Garrett and Ethan!  I neglect this blog and I hate it!  BUT, these 2 darlings keep me hopping from day to day!  And I wouldn't have it any.other.way!  Some of you have also reminded me that I have NEVER even posted pictures of our new home!  Those will come too!  We love our house....just the other day Garrett said "Mommy, there is no place like home.  We have the best home ever!"  I like to think that we do!

Lots of Love to you all and I PROMISE! pictures are coming!  You will be so surprised how big they are getting!  I register Ethan for kindergarten on March 5!  Seriously!  Life goes too fast!

Love,
Shawn
xoxo

I Believe......

I believe...

...That no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in awhile
and you must forgive them for that.

...that you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.

...that you should always leave loved ones with loving words.  It may be the last time you see them.

...that true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance.  Same goes for true love.

...that you can keep going long after you think you cant.

...that either you control your attitude or it controls you

...that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down will be the ones to help you get back up.

...that sometimes when I'm angry, I have the right to be angry, but that doesnt give me the right to be cruel.

...that it isnt always enough to be forgiven by others.  Sometimes, you have to learn to forgive yourself.

...that no matter how bad your heart is broken, the world doesnt stop for your grief.

...that our background & circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.

...that you shouldnt be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.

...that two people can look at the exact same thing & see something totally different.

...that your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who dont even know you.

...that credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being

...that the people you care about most in life are taken from you too soon

...the happiest of people dont necessarily have the best of everything - they just make the most of everything they have.

 

 

Some food for thought on this wonderful Monday!  Hope this finds everyone doing well!

 

Love,

Shawn

The Boys got BAPTIZED!

A very special day this month occurred a few weeks ago!  The boys got BAPTIZED at St. Patrick Church in Franklin.  It was a very special day for us!  I am so tired tonight and am not going to post the details, but I wanted to let you all in on the photos of the day!  Enjoy the video!  A friend I went to high school with came and took pictures for me and she did a GREAT job!  Thanks Olivia!

Baptism Slide Show!

Just click the link and turn up the sound!

 “Go ye therefore, and teach all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost: Teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you: and, lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world. Amen.” Matthew 28:19, 20

It's Been Awhile!

This is my first post in a very long time.

I know many people are under the impression that I have abandoned this blog once again. Some of you have sent me sweet emails and messages asking where I have been and that you have been praying for the boys and I.  I know many of you care deeply for us...for that, I can never say thank you enough.

I wish I could just blame my lack of posts on being busy (which is true) or on the overwhelming strain my body endures keeping up with 2 very active boys (also very true). However, I must be honest with myself in admitting that my absence is much more out of fear than anything else.  It is like I fear recording this season in our life because of it's uncertainties and brokenness!

So much of my life this past year has been full of emotions...grief, fear, anxiety, uncertainty - just to name a few. There are no words to describe the terror of leaving a marriage of 13 years and moving 2 children into a new home, not knowing what the next chapter will hold. There is no way to explain the uncontrollable anxiety of buying a new home, in a new neighborhood and wondering if you can make it on your own and whether you are doing what is best for your children. Grief and fear are emotions that have been all too familiar to me.

Anyone that knows me well, knows that I am a die-hard blog reader.  I read blogs, I think, to add a bit of normalcy to my life.  Anyways, one of my favorites is Angie Smith's blog, Bring the Rain.  I came across it years ago while struggling with a difficult time in my life.  It is unfortunate that I even have to know who she is or relate to her in any way. However, so many of her words and explanation of Scripture have rocked my world. Seriously, the woman is crazy anointed. I swear I want to be just like her.

In her blog, Bring the Rain - this post is titled "The Past and the Pitcher". It discusses, in part, the days following her child's death and how Angie decided she would follow some advice she had read in a book about grieving. In the book, a therapist encourages those grieving to take something and break it. At first, Angie thought the idea was ridiculous but then the Lord began to speak to her heart that breaking something was exactly what she should do. So, she went to her cabinets, pulled out a perfectly good pitcher, walked outside onto her front porch, threw it on the ground and watched it shatter into pieces.

via Angie Smith

She waited a few minutes as she stood there in silence, staring at the broken pieces,

until God finally spoke to her heart...

 

Put it back together.

So, Angie took all the small pieces of porcelain inside and one by one, she glued them back together with a hot glue gun. Her fingers were burnt and bloody from handling the small, sharp pieces. She continued working until finally, the pitcher had been put back together once again.

via Angie Smith

 

Angie then writes these words that still bring tears to my eyes this day,

---

"And as I worked, He let me think about my past. Mistakes that I have long regretted. I began to realize that this pitcher was my life, and every piece was part of a story that He had chosen to put together. I started crying, and remembering things I thought I had forgotten. It took a long time to finish, but it was time well spent. Every nook and cranny whispered to me, until at last it stood in all its imperfection.

Here you are, Angie.

You are mended. You are filled with my Spirit, and I am asking you to pour yourself out.

The image of my life as a broken pitcher was beautiful to me, but at the same time, it was hard to look at all of the cracks.

I ran my fingers along them and told Him I wish it had been different. How I wished I had always loved Him, always obeyed Him, always sought Him the way I should. I was mad at the imperfections, years wasted, gaping holes where it should be smooth.

But God, my ever-gracious God, was gentle and yet convicting as He explained.

My dearest Angie. How do you think the world has seen me? If it wasn't for the cracks, I couldn't seep out the way I do. I chose the pitcher. I chose you, just as you are."

---
 So many times I think, we must be broken before we can be shared...just as the body of Christ had to be broken before it could be given. God wants to use us not in spite of our brokenness, but because of it.

I realize the problem is that we ourselves have developed a mindset that what is broken is useless. We are quick to throw away things in our lives that have cracks or missing pieces. We find no use for them so they find a place in the trash instead of our lives.

I have come to be thankful this year that Christ doesn't think of us this way!
Instead...the more we are broken, the more valuable we become to Him.

I continue to feel like people I run into that is familar with the events of my life this past year look at me and see broken (which is maybe why I feel like these days are not worth recording for my boys to look back on someday)...yet, once they sit and talk with me awhile.....I hope that they don't see broken...I hope they see blessed. That is what I see when I look into the mirror today - but only because I choose to see my life that way, thanks to the grace and strength of God.  I have been blessed with the two most amazing little men in my life and the most wonderful, supportive set of parents that anyone could ask for!  Not to mention my amazing friends, that have provided me with the best support network that anyone could ask for!

It was during a recent conversation with my Aunt Judy that I began to realize that it is through those cracks-- the pains and mistakes that we are most ashamed of-- that the world can see a glimpse of the glory of God.

If are you still reading this long, rambling post, thanks for listening!  There have been many times that I sat down at this computer to record our days, with so many fun-filled things going on with us, only to sit here with nothing to say!  The month of November was amazing for us and I plan to fill you all in with the events real soon!  Garrett turned 8 years old, both boys were baptized and we finished every day this month discussing amongst the 3 of us what we were most thankful for each day! 

I hope to get back on the blog train and show you all how much the boys have grown and blossomed!  Until then, I will leave you with pictures from today....a day spent at home (with Ethan sick, throwing up actually), with my mom and dad here helping me get things done at my house, enjoying the company and help of each other!  My favorite kind of day by far!

Thank you Jesus for being broken...for me.
Today, I rejoice in being broken...for You.

"The Lord Jesus, on the night he was betrayed, took bread, and when he had given thanks, he broke it and said, “This is my body, which is broken for you; do this in remembrance of me.” - 1 Corin. 11:23-24